Stop, pause and ask ... why?

 Do yourself a favour and be more curious

As you know, I always like to write about subjects that have affected me personally over the course of the last week and this week is no different.  

Do you ever get so bogged down with the basics that you forget to take time out to think about how you can actually do things better?  I know I do, especially at work when I get so engrossed in something that I simply forget to stop, pause and ask ... why?

In preparation for a 121 with my boss last week, I was reflecting on what I'd done recently but most importantly, how I could improve going forwards.  That's when it hit me, I need to be more curious.  I always do what's asked of me and on time (usually!) but I'm so focused on actually doing the tasks that I don't stop and question why I'm doing something.  I don't mean from the point of view of being annoying and saying 'yeah but why' every time I'm asked to do something.  I coming from a point of 'yes but why - could I do that differently and better'?  Being more curious would also help me understand things better in general and, if I asked more questions from a position of ignorance in areas I don't fully understand, would that then help other people question why they did things a certain way.

Being more curious and questioning is an important trait to have as a PA so I definitely need to up my game in this area.  You know the age old joke that the PA knows all the latest gossip?  Nope, that ain't me.  To be honest, I don't want that to be me, getting involved in gossip is never a good career move in my eyes.  But you can see what I'm getting at.

I had a meeting later that day so this was my opportunity to seize the moment and dip my toe in the water.  Even after all these years, I still have a minor panic attack every time I ask a question in meetings, especially when I don't understand the topic being discussed.  What if people think I'm stupid?  What if it's the most ridiculous question ever?  What if it just goes silent and there's a tumbleweed moment and you can tell people are thinking ... WTF?

Eek, here goes ... "so does the blah di blah mean that it affects the thingy whatsit"?  "Yes, that's right and it's because the thingy whatsit is related to the doo da".

Oh my god, that wasn't too bad.  I wasn't laughed at by everyone else in the meeting.  I didn't have to turn off my video whilst I cried at how stupid my question had been.  I'd asked a perfectly logical question.  This being more curious malarky wasn't so bad after all.  I'm always really envious of those people who have no worries whatsoever asking a question, it just seems to come natural to them.  Take Mr Bob for example, within 10 minutes of meeting someone he usually knows their life story!  I'm someone who goes over a question in my head a million times, dither about whether to ask it, then someone else gets in before me and asks the same question!!  The good news is that I've done some research on this subject over the last few days (hey, I am curious after all!) and it's a trait that can be learnt, it's not just a lucky few that are born with the curiosity gene.

Here's a few tips that I've discovered which can help you develop your curiosity:

Choose a subject that you're already familiar with but want to explore further.  As you know, I'm already knowledgeable about health and fitness but one area I really want to delve deeper into is how exercise affects us as we get older.  I want to know the stats so that I can use this knowledge to prove that it's never too late to improve your fitness.  If it's a subject area you're already interested in knowing more about, this will definitely help ease you into curiosity.  You could contact subject matter experts in that field and say something along the lines of "I'm already familiar with this part but I wonder if you could explain this area to me in more detail".  Asking questions in relation to something you're already comfortable with is no big deal, you can then move onto other areas that you're not so familiar with.

Observe and spend time with other people who ask lots of questions.  Watch what they do in meetings.  Do they ask questions as and when throughout the meeting?  Do they wait until the end?  How do they phrase their questions?  Observing other people that you respect and admire is a great way to learn.

Do something new.  Trying something new will naturally make you more curious, especially if you're learning something new when you have to ask lots of questions.  This morning I decided to run along a new path I'd never been down before and I naturally had a number of questions popping into my mind.  Why had I never spotted this path before?  Where does it eventually come out?  How long is it?

Block out some time in your diary to be more curious.  Sounds ridiculous I know, but along with everything else in your life, you have to make the time to be more curious.  Set aside 30 mins at the end of the day to reflect:

• What could you have done differently today?
• Where could you have made improvements?
• When should you have questioned something?
• How can you do things better tomorrow?

I hope this has given you a new perspective on being more curious.  The next time you do something automatically, try to catch yourself in the moment and stop, pause and ask ... why?

#2020